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Clinically Depressed Pug

The whole blog has a trigger warning

We focus on helping and supporting those who suffers from any mental illness, but mostly depression. We post memes, quotes, answer asks and we just try to do the best we can.
Aug 30 '14
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: is skinny
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: goes to hospital
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: gets diagnosed
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: is anorexic
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: goes to therapy
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: exercises
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: makes themselves sick
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: doesn't eat
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: is female
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: calorie counts
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: only eats healthy foods
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: has fear foods
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: want to lose weight
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: is obsessed with being skinny
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: cries in front of food
  • not everyone with an eating disorder: is a teenager
Aug 30 '14

SUPPORTING SOMEONE WITH BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER

spiritual-euphoria:

Accurate information.

Knowledge of the biological basis of BPD can help families reframe the behavior of their loved one in the light of current science and accept that evidence-based treatment works. Accurate information can dispel the stigma that colours attitudes toward people with BPD.

Understanding.

Understand that the person with BPD is doing the best they can and does not intend to harm others or himself (debatable, sometimes a person with BPD can also have other conditions such as depression.) Discourage viewing the person with BPD as “manipulative,” as the enemy, or as hopeless. Understanding can melt anger and cultivate compassion.

Acceptance.

Accept that the person with BPD has a disability and has special needs. Help the family accept their loved one as someone with a chronic illness. They may continue to be financially and emotionally dependent on the family and be vocationally impaired. BPD is a deficit or handicap that can be overcome. Help families to reconcile to the long-term course of BPD and accept that progress will be slow. There are no short-term solutions.

Compassion.

Do not assume that every family is a “dysfunctional family.” Emotions are contagious. Living with someone with BPD can make any family dysfunctional. Family members have been recipients of rages as well as abusive and irrational behaviors. They live in perpetual fear and feel manipulated. They often react by either protecting and rescuing or rejecting and avoiding. Reframe their points of view with compassion. Families are doing the best they can. They need support and acceptance. “Bad parents” are usually uninformed, not malevolent. They did the wrong things for the right reasons (the “allergic to milk syndrome”). Anyone can have a disturbed child. Keep reminding the family of the neurobiological dysregulations of BPD, and of the pain their loved one is coping with each day.

Collaboration for change.

Accept that families can help, can learn effective skills and become therapeutic partners. They can reinforce treatment. The IQ of a family member is not reduced if a loved one has BPD. Do not patronize or fragelize family members. Family members are generally well-educated, intelligent people who are highly motivated to help. Respect their commitment. When you provide them with effective skills to help their loved one, they can become therapeutic parent or partners. You can help them.

Stay in the present.

Do not focus on past painful experiences when the person with BPD cannot cope with aversive feelings and has no distress tolerance skills. Avoid shame-inducing memories. If you induce arousal and the patient cannot cope with the arousal, therapy becomes unacceptable, giving her additional pressure and stress and undermining cognitive control. This is a sure-fire way to get her to drop out of therapy.

Be nonjudgmental.

Respect that families are doing the best they can, in the moment, without any understanding of the underlying disorders or the ability to translate their loved one’s behaviors. Although they may have done the wrong thing in the past, it was probably for the right reasons. Their intention was not to hurt their loved one.

Corroborate allegations.

Try not to assume the worst, and corroborate allegations. Remember that your perception of an event or experience may be different from what actually happened.

Avoid boundaries, limits, contracts, and tough love.

These methods are not effective with people with BPD. Be sure that families understand that boundaries are generally viewed as punishment by the person with BPD. Be sure they understand how to change behavior by explaining reinforcement, punishment, shaping, and extinction so that they do not reinforce maladaptive behaviors.

Discourage “we.”

Encourage family members to nurture individual relationships with the person with BPD, not the united front of “we.” Although both parents can have the same goals for their loved one, they must express these goals in their own style, in one-on-one relationships. Focus on developing individual relationships and trust, not solving individual problems. This will discourage “splitting.”

Aug 29 '14
thunar:

This dragon just needs a break.

thunar:

This dragon just needs a break.

Aug 29 '14
bobdoom:

A basket of happiness.

bobdoom:

A basket of happiness.

(Source: nabucopugs.blogspot.com)

Aug 29 '14
"If I am ignoring you, I apologize. I become distracted and will focus on one thing a while. Sometimes I’m just emotionally overwhelmed and I have to lay down for a while. I’m not ignoring you because it’s you it’s because life is distracting and hard and so sometimes I just need to stop talking to people and sometimes I do that suddenly."
Aug 29 '14

(Source: derikisu)

Aug 29 '14
shutthefuckupcas:

Just some thoughts

shutthefuckupcas:

Just some thoughts

Aug 28 '14
"I’ve already said too much. I’ve already shared too much, and now I want all my secrets back. I hate getting too close to people. I regret having shared so much, for having cared so much, for allowing myself to feel so much."
Aug 28 '14

10 Lies Depression Tells You | Anne Thériault

usakeh:

1. You are a bad person who deserves bad things.

2. You are unhappy because you are lazy or lacking in willpower. Happiness is a choice, a choice that you have failed to make. Somehow, somewhere over the course of your lifetime, when faced with some metaphysical fork in the road, you chose the wrong path. You brought this curse down on yourself.

3. Your sadness is the baseline by which the rest of your life should be measured. This sadness is your norm, and any other emotions, especially positive ones, are exceptions to the rule. Yes of course there will be good times, of course there will be flashes of joy; you will certainly, on occasion, experience the pleasure of a good book or a ripe juicy peach, However, those experiences will be few and far between. Your bad days will always outnumber the good.

4. Your family and friends do not love you. Your family are people who feel obligated to spend time with you because as luck would have it you share a similar genetic makeup. Your friends are people that you somehow tricked into thinking that you, as a person, have some kind of value, and now they don’t know how to extricate themselves from your pathetic, needy grasp. No one spends time with you because they enjoy it; they do it out of a sense of duty, a feeling of pity. Whenever you leave a room everyone breathes a sigh of relief.

5. Your family and friends do not want to hear about how sad you are. No matter how sympathetic they may seem, no matter how sincerely they might ask how you are feeling, remember that it’s all an act. The more that you open yourself up to them, the more you pour your heart out, the more resentful of you they become. Do not fall into the trap of sharing your feelings; do not give into the temptation to draw back the curtain and, like a tawdry magician, reveal your grotesque sadness. Your sadness is a choice, remember? This burden is yours to bear alone.

6. Your friends and family deserve better than you. Everyone deserves better than you.

7. In order to make up for your unhappiness, it is your responsibility to make sure that everyone around you is happy. If you can manage to maintain a near-constant veneer of kindness, helpfulness and sincere interest in others, then that will make your presence more tolerable. Your amiability, though entirely inadequate, is the best apology that you can make for your existence.

8. Everything is your fault.

If you plan a picnic and it rains, it’s your fault. You should have been more thorough when you checked the weather. You should have learned to be an amateur meteorologist so that you could better read the clouds. You should have packed a canopy. If you go out for dinner, for your once-in-a-blue-moon, hire-a-babysitter-and-wear-a-nice-dress date and the food or service or conversation is anything less than exceptional, it’s your fault. You should have read more restaurant reviews, should have asked friends for more recommendations, should have prepared cue cards with talking points. If someone is unkind to you, it’s your fault. You should have smiled more, been more gracious, tried harder to be whatever it was that they needed in that moment.

Everything is your fault.

9. There is no cure for your sadness, no effective treatment, no way of managing your symptoms. There are, of course, doctors and pills and various therapies that help other people, but you’ve tried all these things and they don’t work for you. Nothing will ever work for you.

10. You will feel this way forever.

If you are depressed, experiencing suicidal thoughts or otherwise need someone to talk to, please call 1-800-273-8255.

Source.

This article hits so close to home with me, right now.

Aug 28 '14

quitpretendingyourenormal:

Fed up of hearing
“Everyone else has bad days too”
Yeah I fucking know that! I’m not acting like I’m the only one on the world!
And tbh hearing about everyone’s ‘bad days’ is one of the things that drove me to this illness you prick!

"Everyone else has bad days too"
Is one of the most condescending, patronising and insulting things you can say to someone who is ill and not doing well. It’s just a cowardly way of saying either ‘I don’t know what to say’ or ‘I don’t care’

or ‘let’s talk about my problems instead.”

Aug 28 '14

l-l-l-l-l0la:

I want a chapter in my book called “things to remember when you feel helpless” and I need some other peoples tips and tricks. So if you have a mental illness or just know someone with one please email florencegledhillwriting@hotmail.co.uk please include your advice, age and full name. if I use your advice you will be credited at the end of the book. Taaaaa xxx

Aug 28 '14

Things people don’t get about living with mental illness #558

iamgwenslongroadhome:

Life can easily become a giant triage unit. You suddenly lack the resources to deal with everything at once when you need to so you have to pick what is most important every single day and hope when you deal with that you have enough left for the rest.

Aug 28 '14

Reblog if it’s not okay to make fun of someone’s problems

kawaii-klaus:

Anxiety, Depression, Tremors, Mental illness / Physical illness of any kind, anything.

I need to prove to somebody that it’s NOT okay in any way shape or form.

Aug 28 '14
37 notes (via fini-mun) Tags: ptsd
Aug 28 '14